Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Five Rupees Feast

Today, we learn the technique of eating fantastic food all day for just Rs.5.

I assume here that you have one decent formal-looking pant-shirt with you. Wear it and get an Economic Times newspaper (Rs.3) and a gift wrapper (Rs.2). Here we go -

Breakfast time:
Find the nearest "star hotel"
Reach by 8AM or so
Fold up the ET and put it under your arm.
Walk briskly past the reception
Take the escalator and go to a random floor 
Find a room with the newspaper bag still hanging outside
They're surely still asleep
Now go to the breakfast room
They'll ask you for your room number
Give them that newspaper bag's room number
They'll tick it on the sheet and give you a table
Enjoy the free All-you-can-eat buffet breakfast
Choose from at least 30 dishes
Walk out dishing "Good morning"s to everyone around

Dinner time:
Fold up that same Economic Times 
Wrap it using the giftwrapping paper
Find the nearest wedding reception hall
Walk briskly inside smiling at everyone you see
Girl's side will think you are from the boy's side
Boy's side will think you are from the girl's side
Neither will want to embarass the other's family
Once you are in, get rid of the wrapping paper
Walk straight to the dinner table
Enjoy your free All-you-can-eat buffet dinner
Choose from at least 20 dishes
Walk out dishing smiles to everyone around

Oh, you want lunch also? Well, as the cliche goes, there are no free lunches.

For Rs.5, you just ate more food than 99.999999..99% of the world gets in a day.


alltrueist said...

Thanks for the tips, pal. Outlook for the day seemed bleak, thought I would have to go hungry. But then, you've made my day!!
PS: I can do without lunch...I don't lunch anyway!

thevc said...

ROFL :) Good one!